# packetlog >

What Mr. Know-It-All Doesn't Know

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** What Mr. Know-It-All Doesn't Know **
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-- What Mr. Know-It-All doesn't know is that nobody takes him seriously anymore -- and he has no friends now.

[Date: Mar 16, 2010]

Life on Mars

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** Life on Mars **
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-- Did you hear !!  They've found a life form on Mars!!!
-- Can you eat it?

[Date: Mar 16, 2010]

How to Write a Business Case

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** How to Write a Business Case **
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Think of it this way. The obstinate child has got hold of your wallet.  So you promise him a trip to Disneyland this summer and you get back your wallet.

[Date: Mar 15, 2010]

Monday Blues

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** Monday Blues **
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-- Mondays are so hard.
-- Get married, you fool.  All your weekends you will look forward to Mondays.

[Date: Feb 10, 2010]

The Killer App

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** The Killer App **
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-- Yes, that was our killer app.  It killed our company.

[Date: Feb 27, 2010]

How to Avoid Giving IT Support to New Acquaintances

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** How to Avoid Giving IT Support to New Acquaintances **
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-- I heard you are an IT expert and ...
-- Yes, I specialize in PC-maintenance insurances.  For just $599, I can extend your warranty to two and half years.

[Date: Feb 26, 2010]

Microsoft's Problems in Mobile Space

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** Microsoft's Problems in Mobile Space **
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--  Mr. Ballmer, could you describe Microsoft's problems in mobile space today in just three words?
-- Developers! Developers! Developers!

[Date: Feb 22, 2010]
   

My Zen Moment

 

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** My Zen Moment **
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-- Hate everyone and everything so that you are freed from all worldly attachments.

[Date: Feb 19, 2010]

Psychoanalyst Parents

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** Psychoanalyst Parents  **
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--  Both of my parents were psychoanalysts and it was hell.  Father was of Freudian school and mother was Jungian.

[Date: Feb 18, 2010]

You Are the Real Sleeping Buddha

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** You Are the Real Sleeping Buddha **
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-- Becoming a Buddha is easy: you just need to wake up!  In that sense, we are all Sleeping Buddhas.

[Date: Feb 13, 2010]

The Monk

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** The Monk **
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-- So deep was his meditation that the Venerable Monk hasn't read his emails for weeks.

[Date: Feb 17, 2010]

Interview for an IT HelpDesk Assistant

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** Interview for an IT HelpDesk Assistant **
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-- You mean you *don't* have a diploma in Jungian Analysis?


[Date: Feb 17, 2010]

Maya

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** Maya **
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-- Gurudev! How can I see through the Veil of Maya?
-- You should practice first by throwing away your iPhone and seeing through the Veil of Steve.

[Date: Feb 17, 2010]

A Word to the Wise

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** A Word to the Wise **
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-- Gurudev, who is wise and who foolish?
-- A wise person knows the limitations of a system and lives within the constraints without complaints.  A foolish person goes on and on and on about the iPad not supporting the Flash.



[Date: Feb 10, 2010]    

5g Phone

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** 5g Phone **
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--  What does he mean by "a 5g phone"?
--  Maybe the SIM card will not exceed five grams in weight? 

[Date: Feb 10, 2010]   

That's Fast

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** That's Fast **
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--  He is the fastest programmer we have.  He can go 80 words per minute.


[Date: Feb 10, 2010]    

What Men Really Want

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** What Men Really Want  **
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-- Secretly, a man would like to marry a girl who is accomplished in martial arts. No goons would ever dare touch him.



[Date: Feb 10, 2010]    

Choosing Usernames

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** Choosing Usernames **
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-- If you are a photographer, usernames like 24-70mmf2dot8 may appeal to you.


[Date: Feb 6, 2010]      

User Profiles

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** User Profiles **
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-- From an IT Service Desk point of view, there are three types of users:  Regular Staff, Senior Executives and People Who Think They Are Senior Executives.

[Date: Dec 18, 2009]
                     

Holistic

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** Holistic **
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-- His holistic approach, as you may have seen, is full of holes.


[Date: Dec 18, 2009]